From the Annals of Airport Security
| Wed Oct. 15, 2008 9:31 AM PDT
FROM THE ANNALS OF AIRPORT SECURITY....Jeffrey Goldberg and Bruce Schneier explain why the no-fly list is not just a gargantuan monster that's gotten completely out of hand and made the lives of uncounted innocent people miserable, but a useless gargantuan monster that's gotten completely out of hand and made the lives of uncounted innocent people miserable:
To slip through the only check against the no-fly list, the terrorist uses a stolen credit card to buy a ticket under a fake name. "Then you print a fake boarding pass with your real name on it and go to the airport. You give your real ID, and the fake boarding pass with your real name on it, to security. They're checking the documents against each other. They're not checking your name against the no-fly list — that was done on the airline's computers. Once you're through security, you rip up the fake boarding pass, and use the real boarding pass that has the name from the stolen credit card. Then you board the plane, because they're not checking your name against your ID at boarding."
What if you don't know how to steal a credit card?
"Then you're a stupid terrorist and the government will catch you," he said.
What if you don't know how to download a PDF of an actual boarding pass and alter it on a home computer?
"Then you're a stupid terrorist and the government will catch you."
I couldn't believe that what Schneier was saying was true — in the national debate over the no-fly list, it is seldom, if ever, mentioned that the no-fly list doesn't work. "It's true," he said. "The gap blows the whole system out of the water."
Other tips: you can carry all the liquid on board a plane that you want as long as you put it in a bottle marked "saline solution." Or hide it on your person in a Beerbelly™. Just don't look too nervous while you're doing it, OK?
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Comments
But the watch list does work. A group of kids and teachers from a local Catholic school were flying to Memphis from Minneapolis. One of the kids was named Jose Garcia and the airline didn't want to let him on the plane.
Homeland security at it's finest.
Another idiocy: I sell an item that could be used in the commission of a terrorist act. Many people do. You could sell steak knives and make that claim. My company and others in the same industry require that prospective buyer names be screened through something called the "Office of Foreign Assets Control" website. Supposedly the names of all suspected terrorists are contained there. You type in the name and it either responds "No suspicious activity" or it claims something needs looked into with this buyer. Totally worthless exercise. Bullshit. If a terrorist needed what I sold he merely gets someone else to buy it. Failing that he just instructs the salesperson to bill the item to "ABC Corporation" and leaves with the item. There is no requirement an individual's name is entered. The database will process a check of ABC Corporation and give a verdict, even if no such company as ABC exists. And guess what, if ABC is the contrived product of a terrorist's imagination IT WON'T GET FRICKING FLAGGED IN THE DATABASE!! DUH. There is no requirement we check incorporation papers, ask for some sort of proof ABC really does anything, has an address or in any way wasn't dreamed up 5 minutes ago. 9/11 rendered the citizens of this nation the stupidest people on the planet. Game, set, match to Mr. bin Laden.
Another tip: Thanks to the alchohol lobby you can purchase liter bottles of 180 proof alcohol at the duty free store beyond security. In combination with one of those lighters the ciggarette companies have lobbied for and a suitcase full of synthetic fiber clothing you can probably take down just about any plane.
Here's a scary one from the Dubai airport three years ago. We got off the plane on the tarmac and were then bussed to the airport. There was a huge line to get in. I kept jockeying for position in the line. Suddenly, I realized that I was already past security and nobody had checked me at all. Oops. And I was never checked again when I boarded the next plane. I could have just walked off the street with a bomb in my carry-on. And got on a plane without ever passing through any security. And that's in Dubai. Think there might be some terrorists going through that airport? There's certainly a fair share of mercenaries, arms traders, and money launderers. The scary thing is that it gets worse. I was stuck there for two days and was really bored. So I decided to violate security again just to pass the time. It was fun, and I did it five more times. I had no training in this kind of thing. I was just drunk and bored. The only thing that protects that airport is the fact that most of the terrorist financing goes through Dubai. Wouldn't want to bite the hand that feeds you.
If a terrorist wanted to take down a plane wouldn't working from the inside accomplish it? Airport employees don't make a great deal of money. Certainly giving a baggage handler $100,000 in cash to assist in some sort of plot would enable the deed. Find one with a record, in debt, sketchy allegiances to the nation, don't give a damn attitude, disregard for human life. You know, the average citizen. Tell the guy the target plane is France bound and full of feminist atheist journalists writing a negative story about McCain. The terrorist would have to fight off the volunteers.
"If a terrorist wanted to take down a plane wouldn't working from the inside accomplish it?"
Good point, Steve. I spent four hours being interrogated in the Auckland airport for having methamphetamine residue on my luggage. Turns out, my baggage was used to transport drugs by a smuggling ring that used the baggage handlers. They put it in after the security checks, and then took it out before it even got inside the next airport.
Certainly giving a baggage handler $100,000 in cash to assist in some sort of plot would enable the deed. Find one with a record, in debt, sketchy allegiances to the nation, don't give a damn attitude, disregard for human life. You know, the average citizen.
Better yet, just have one of your cell members get a job doing baggage handling. It can't be that hard to get a job at the airport. Maybe it's harder for certain nationalities.
But still, do that, and they'll pay you!
"Maybe it's harder for certain nationalities. "
Depends on the airport. In Dubai, they normally hire Pakistanis. That's reassuring, isn't it? The guy handling your bags might have actually met bin Laden personally. But at least you can be assured that the gift shops will hire hot blond Swedish women.
Downing a plane is a good way to incite panic in our economy and cause a lot of psychological mayhem. Why the 9/11 plotters chose their particular acts we may never know. Not everyone flies. It seems something like a poison or toxin in a major city's drinking water would work better to mess with our heads. Everyone drinks tap water, or bathes in it, cooks with it and does laundry. If I never flew 9/11 was still awful but doesn't represent a direct threat to me. Poisoned drinking water killing a few dozen people in Cleveland has me looking over my shoulder. I could be next. I think sometimes the things we fear most are the least likely to happen. 9/11 has been done. The next attack if it's coming will be something completely different. Probably something we aren't even preparing for. Kinda like flying planes into buildings was.
Not sure about saline solution, but if you say it's liquid baby formula they let it pass. And I think they'll allow ice packs if you say it's to keep medicine cold...
Haven't we already lost the 'war on terror' if our citizens are traveling scared?
Private jet companies typically have no security at all. You wonder how all the coke and heroin arrives in the states? and whay it's so freakin expensive? It's flown in on a chartered jet. pretty much anyone can just drive up with their car on the tarmac, pick up the goods, and take off.
Most of these charter flights have a berth at major airports, so gaining access to, say BWI or OAK or SFO is pretty easy.
I guess I'll be put ont he no fly list again, after this posting. The last time I was on it was due to feeding the homeless with a soup kitchen.
