Fatter Americans, Hotter World
| Wed Oct. 25, 2006 11:01 AM PDT
American's ever-expanding waistlines aren't just bad for our national health - they're bad for the atmosphere too. A new study from the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign found that the extra drag on car engines caused by their drivers' increasing weight means that Americans are using at least 938 million more gallons of gas annually today than they were four decades ago, when they weighed an average of 24 pounds less.
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And here I was thinking my car was just tired because it has 240,000 miles on the engine. Instead I understand that my portliness is to blame for my car's inability to briskly climb the hills of San Francisco.
And gee, four decades ago? In 1966 I weighed at least 200 pounds less than I do now, not just 24!
Yes, it's time to deport everyone who weighs more than 300 pounds. Just think how easy it would be to catch them all! These big folk couldn't run away fast enough!
But where would we put 'em all? A concentration of the heavy-set in any one country might cause the planet to tilt on its axis!
Did they take into account that people are taller, and just plain larger than they were back then? In 1966 the average height for a male high school senior was probably something like 5 ft. 9 in. I recently met a 19 year old who feels that he's too short because he was one of the shortest kids in his class. He's "only" 6 feet tall.
Submitted by puslu vadi (not verified) on Mon Jul. 21, 2008 10:46 AM PDT.
938 million more gallons of gas annually today than they were four decades ago, when they weighed an average of 24 pounds less. what :S
You did not mention that you fat Americans fart methane gas that contributes to global warming as much as all the auto exhaust. Go vegetarian, be thin, like us Chinese. White men prefer us(because we are green, amongst other reasons).
...you fat Americans fart methane gas...
Are we to presume that the Chinese fart phosgene gas?
You know, I don't recall ever seeing a Chinese person who was colored green, except maybe in a St. Patrick's Day parade.
Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going back for second helpings of the Mu Shu Pork, Chicken Flied Lice and Peking Duck.
L. Wong opines: Loosie Loo Loo, you are a racist.
My wife's maiden name is Park, [deleted].
Her parents were Koreans who immigrated after the Korean "police action".
Her father was my Hapkido instructor, chump.
Stick that in your pipe & choke on it Mr. or Ms. Wong.
Maybe you think the nonsense "Lucy Lu" posts every time the subject of fat Americans comes up makes Asians look intelligent and appealing, but if so, you should think again.
Maybe you think idiots like "Lucy Lu" shouldn't be challenged on their idiotic posts because they claim to be Asian, but if so, you should think again.
And if you want my wife's opinion on those points, I'll have her give it to ya'.
